Pondering the complexities of life.

Sunday, February 26

Equal Opportunity Offender


The rabbi and the priest met at the town's annual picnic. Old friends, they began their usual banter.

"This ham is really delicious," the priest teased the rabbi. "You really ought to try it. I know it's against your religion, but you just haven't lived until you have tried Mrs. Hall's prized Virginia Baked Ham. Tell me, when are you going to break down and have some?"

The rabbi looked at his friend and replied with big grin, "At your wedding."

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During the Cold War, the Air Force was testing a computer that was supposed to be able to translate English to Russian and vice versa. The first test phrase used was, "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak."

The Russian translation came out, "Vodka horosho, no myaca slabie." Or in English: "The alcohol is good, but the meat is poor."

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Paul and I went to see a play last night entitled "Underpants," which was adapted by Steve Martin. It's a single-scene play where everything takes place in the same apartment, so no elaborate set changes are required. The story begins when a woman, stretching and reaching to see a passing parade, accidentally looses her bloomers. The humiliating incident sparks a flurry of interest in the room she and her husband have for rent in their home - the prospective renters - all male - having all been spectators at the parade. It was a very cute and funny play. My favorite line is uttered by the woman's husband, who is constantly critisizing her, when he discovers they are out of sugar. "I keep trying to stop nagging you, but you won't let me!" I can think of copious opportunities to utilize that line!!

I hesitate to complain, knowing Kira has it much worse than I do, but the distance between Paul's house and my house is really getting to be a pain. We have to schedule times to get together around our kids' schedules. Adding an hour of travel each way to the already limited amount of time we're able to carve out is exhausting. I told him last night that we should both sell our houses and buy something in the middle! I was kidding (sort of) and I wouldn't co-habitate as long as I have kids at home (hypocritical? maybe...) but it would just be SO MUCH easier if we were 10-15 minutes apart instead of an hour apart!

Whine...whine...whine! I just finished taking TWO vacations and I'm already whining! How horrible is that??

Honestly, I do realize how lucky I am and that this distance thing is merely an inconvenience. I just tend to lose perspective after going to bed at 3AM and getting up at 6:30AM for church. 3.5 hours of sleep is not enough. (5.5 hours would be fine...but there's that damned travel time!!!)

Perhaps a nap is in order?

13 Comments:

Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Perfect!! Take naps at work....

3:28 PM

 
Blogger WordWhiz said...

Gene: Took a nap this afternoon. I don't know if it made me feel better or worse!!

Steve: Hey man! Nice to see you around! Have missed you! I hope all is well.

9:26 PM

 
Blogger kenju said...

Maybe moving 1/2 of the way closer would be the right thing. I do applaud you for not living together while you have kids at home. That's not hypocritical, it is practical. The children should not have to deal with that. Would moving take you too far from work and schools?

11:53 PM

 
Blogger Miss Cellania said...

Loved the rabbi joke!

And I certainly understand about the kids, I would be the same way (if I were presented with the opportunity).

4:02 AM

 
Blogger WordWhiz said...

Kenju: My daughter will graduate at the end of this school year, at which time moving will be a more feasible option. My 12-year-old son, who spends part of his time with me and part with his dad, already goes to school in a different town. On the one school night a week when I have him, I have to drive him to school. It's something to think about.

MC: I don't really have a problem with couples living together... only when children are involved. I guess that's why I wondered if my ideas were hypocritical. I think we need to set an example which is closer to what we think is ideal than to what we're willing to accept.

6:42 AM

 
Blogger ... said...

naps DO solve a lot of problems.

1:12 PM

 
Blogger Big Dave T said...

Naps are okay, but I need at least six hours sleep some days, seven hours most. My buddy keeps telling me there'll be plenty of time to sleep when we take the ultimate dirt nap.

Thanks for your comment on my blog. I've noticed too the demise of the family restaurant. Everywhere you look around here, you find those ten dollar burger joints--Appleby's, Bennigan's, Friday's, Red Robins, Max & Erma's, etc.

I miss Bill Knapp's! It's now La Shish, a Mediterranean restaurant.

2:58 PM

 
Blogger Kira said...

Complain away! Distance is always a bitch even if your distance isn't so bad. I hate the two hour commute every weekend, but it's better than when it was a nine hour plane ride to France! See? Improvement! And your improvement was finding Paul so you could finally have a real man in your life, so you're getting there as well. We have one year and three months before we can be married and living in the same place. Who says I'm counting? Anyway, it's easier to think of there being an end in sight, so every time I get mopey as I drive home, I remember: five days, we're together again, and eventually it's forever in the same place.

Jared actually told me that I needed to hurry up and get married to Alex so he'd live with us. I said, oh, so you really like him then, eh? He looked shocked as he realized what he admitted...and then paused before he came up with, Yeah, that way Alex can help me with my Bionicles right away instead of only on weekends! Alex thought it was great to be so needed ;)

4:17 PM

 
Blogger mcgibfried said...

whizzer.. the rabbi jokes?
you will have to bring more when you're drunk in sin city!

:)

7:37 PM

 
Blogger bornfool said...

I swear I commented on this post yesterday, but I guess it didn't take. Blogger is messing with me or I'm losing my mind. Probably the second one.

9:48 AM

 
Blogger poopie said...

So am I a bitch if I say "at least you've got a fella who adores you?" Nah. Just envious.

6:50 PM

 
Blogger naughtygirl said...

lol at the jokes..and nap time sounds good!!

7:55 PM

 
Blogger WordWhiz said...

No Poopie, you're not a bitch. I'm just a whiner!! Point taken!! Thanks!

10:23 PM

 

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