Few things are less useful than a 46-year-old uterus

The doctor talked me into giving it a little more time before insisting that they rip the torture device from my body. She insisted that these "little annoyances" generally disappear after three months and nearly always disappear after six months. She told me she wouldn't put me back on the patch because it was too risky for someone of my advanced age. (The word "advanced" being my own editorial addition. She was tactful enough to leave off the obvious adjective!)

I told her I'd give it two to three months. If things remained the same, I wanted the thing OUT! She told me that my iron levels were fine and that I wasn't loosing enough blood for it to be a health hazard. Who cares!? Whatever their tests may indicate, I know for a fact that enduring a two week period every month WOULD kill me!!

There were no apparent problems or infections and the pregnancy test was negative. (No kidding!! Didn't I just tell you I've been experiencing the endless period??)

A woman's reproductive system should automatically shut down at age 45. She shouldn't even be considering having a baby at that age! If I get to fill out a customer survey upon reaching heaven, that will be my suggestion!! That, and the elimination of fleas and ticks. They are even more useless than a 46-year-old woman's uterus!